8 Things to Do Before Your First Therapy Session

Being on time is important in therapy. Therapists usually schedule 45- or 50-minute “therapy hours” to allow them to take notes and prepare between sessions. To make sure you get your full “hour,” it’s important to arrive at least five minutes before your session is scheduled to begin.

If you’re seeing a therapist in your local community, it’s a good idea to research the location first, plan your commute, and learn where to park (if you’re taking a car).

If you’re having an online therapy session, you should make sure your internet connection and computer are set up and that you know where and how to log in.

By taking these steps, you can prevent missing part of your first session because of the time it took to find parking or get your online session started.

Journaling gives you a jumping-off point for therapy by helping you connect with yourself and better understand what you might what to talk about with your therapist. If you don’t already keep a journal, consider starting one to help you gather your thoughts for therapy.

Journaling can be pretty simple and still give you a lot of benefits. You can spend as little as ten minutes a day writing down your thoughts and gain so much clarity and perspective from it.

In addition to writing in whatever way comes naturally to you, consider tracking information related to the symptoms or concerns that are bringing you to therapy. It will help you get more out of your first sessions by giving you data to share with your therapist. You may want to start a new journal for this.

Remember to bring your journal with you to your first session!

Depression, anxiety, and other mental health conditions can sometimes worsen to a point of crisis. If you’re thinking about harming yourself or someone else, can’t take care of yourself, or otherwise feel unsafe, you need help right away.

You can get the help you need by calling a mental health crisis line or going to a local mental health crisis center or hospital.

Not all crises require emergency care. If you’re feeling worse, but you don’t feel unsafe or at risk of harm, there are things you can do to care for yourself while you’re waiting for your first session. Reach out to people in your support network, take time for self-care, and spend a little time writing or talking about what’s on your mind, including anything you’re grateful for or that gives you hope.

The most important thing you can do is give yourself credit for taking the steps you’ve taken. Help is on the way. There is so much hope and promise when you’re about to start therapy. Most people who go to therapy are helped by it, and many people experience life-changing positive results from therapy.

Learning more about therapy can help you get more out of your first therapy sessions. Reading or listening to stories from people who were helped by therapy can be informative as well as inspiring. You can learn a lot about what therapy is like by listening to other people describe their experiences.

It can also be helpful to learn a little bit about the different methods therapists use, especially the method your new therapist will be using in their sessions with you.

Keep in mind your therapist will probably spend your first session or two asking a lot of questions so they can assess your needs and plan your treatment. This will be true no matter what kind of therapist you’re seeing.

But once regular sessions get underway, the knowledge you have about your therapist’s method will help you understand why your therapist does things a certain way. It will also help you anticipate what your therapist will ask from you and how to prepare for your sessions.

For example, if you’re seeing a Jungian analyst, you may want to prepare by noting down any recent dreams you’ve had. If you’re seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist, you can prepare by writing down any worrisome thoughts you’re experiencing or situations that trigger symptoms you want to address.

In your first therapy sessions, you’ll talk about your reasons for coming to therapy. You’ll talk about what’s been going on in your life that is painful, difficult, or at least not working as well as you’d like. You’ll talk about things you want to change and any goals you might have.

It’s okay to start without concrete goals, but therapy is more effective when you have at least some idea of what you want to accomplish. By knowing what you want to get out of therapy, you’ll be able to track your progress and your therapist will be able to focus your sessions on what’s most important to you.

Your goals might be related to mental health issues you want to improve. You might want to feel less depressed or anxious. Or your mental health might be basically okay, but you might be having a hard time changing something you want to change. You might be having a hard time adjusting to change that has already occurred. You might want to strengthen an important relationship or improve your overall level of social connection and support.

There are many valid goals for therapy, and if you’re not sure exactly what yours are, your therapist can help you identify some during your first few sessions with them.

While most therapists are prepared to work with a wide range of people, it can sometimes take a few tries to find the therapist who’s the best match for you.

If you have information about your therapist, review it before your session to see if any concerns about compatibility arise. Come up with some questions you can ask to check if you’re a match.

For example, you might want to ask if your therapist has worked with other people with your symptoms or how long they expect it will take to reach your therapeutic goals.

You might want to explore whether your therapist shares or understands different aspects of your identity or background. You’ll want to at least make sure that you feel understood and supported when you talk about your experiences and not judged.

You learn a lot by listening to your intuition and how you feel during and after a session. Do you feel like you can trust this therapist and open up to them? Do you feel like they care? Do you like their sense of humor and their style? Do your personalities click?

If talking to your therapist feels good, and you look forward to your sessions with them, chances are good you can do some good work together in therapy.

It’s okay if you feel like they’re not a good match and decide to keep looking. Therapists value the fit between client and therapist as much as you and will understand. A strong therapeutic alliance is an essential component of successful therapy. If they’re not the right match for you, they’ll support you looking for a therapist who is. They might even be able to make a recommendation or a referral to a colleague who might be a better fit.

Therapy sessions can bring up deep feelings and unexpected insights. It can be jarring to jump into something intense right after therapy, so try to schedule free time after your first session for personal reflection if you can.

You may want to go to a favorite park or café. If you keep a journal, it’s a good idea to bring it with you. It’s great to talk to someone you trust about how your session went, but it can be even better if you collect your thoughts on your own before you do.

On the other hand, you may want to go home and get cozy right away. It can feel really good to follow up a therapy session with another form of self-care. Consider doing yoga, going for a walk, playing with your pet, drawing or painting, or reading a favorite book.

Therapy is all about making time and space for yourself, and it can add to the benefit of therapy if you can extend that time and space a little before and after your sessions.

If your life is busy, it’s okay. Even little chunks of time can make a difference. You can do something during your commute that’s supportive, like listening to an inspiring podcast or e-book. It may be possible to schedule time for reflection later in the day or even on a different day of the week.

It’s common to have to wait a couple of weeks to get in to see a therapist. But sometimes the wait is even longer. Some people wait months—or even as long as a year—to get in with a particular therapist.

If the wait is really long, consider whether it’s worth it. How specific are your therapy preferences? How much special expertise do you need a therapist to have? If you don’t have a compelling reason to wait to see this one specific person, consider looking for another therapist.

At OpenCounseling, we advise putting a lot of thought into choosing a therapist and believe finding the right match is key to success in therapy. However, it’s possible to over-think it, and the timing of when you start therapy is usually at least as important as which therapist you see. So, it’s usually best to look for a good-enough therapist who can see you sooner.

If you’re not finding what you need on your insurance company’s list of in-network therapists (or you don’t have insurance), low-cost counseling may be available in your area through non-profit agencies, the public mental health system, or from therapists who offer a sliding scale. If you’re not finding a good match locally, you could try affordable online counseling with BetterHelp (a sponsor).

We hope this article will help you get off to a great start in therapy. Waiting can be frustrating, but embracing the wait can help you set yourself up for success. Be patient—you may be just days away from changing your life!